Post by Jack Evans on Jul 4, 2009 16:43:03 GMT
One with her hands
Open
"Don't Be afraid" she said
"No one will know it -
Just you and me"
And when it's over
I'll go back
_______________________________________________
Jack sat in her car with the engine turned off, though the key was set to auxiliary so that a small stream of air was still breezing past her face and the radio could still be heard, faintly droning on the ending of an old Pearl Jam song. She had been sitting there, parked in the Michigan State staff parking lot for well over half an hour, chain-smoking and attempting to work up enough courage to actually get herself out of her car and just go inside of the building already. She had, at the very least, planned ahead for such a hesitation and had driven there about an hour early, knowing that this first step would be the most difficult for her. However, she had hoped that she was overestimating just how much time she would need to psych herself up; she had not and, in fact, was rapidly edging closer and closer to being late for her first day.
It wasn’t like she hadn’t been inside of the Michigan State building before. She had, in fact, been there twice already; once when she went in for the job interview and then again after she was hired and had to fill out what had seemed like an endless stream of paperwork and then have her picture taken for her picture id badge so that she could be properly identified as staff. She should not have been having so much trouble going in, yet, there she was, still sitting in her car telling herself how utterly unreasonable she was being. Taking a long drag from her cigarette, she then smoothed her hair back out of her face and then turned the volume knob on the radio, hoping for a little bit of musical inspiration to help her with getting out of the car. The familiar raw intro guitar sound of some Nirvana song that she knew but couldn’t identify immediately on began playing. Jack turned the volume up just a little more, nodding her head slightly to the beat, prepared for the music to pump her up enough to continue on with her day.
”Rape me, rape me my friend...”
A loud cackle of laughter burst forth from her lips, causing Jack to slap a hand over her mouth with one hand and to quickly turn the radio power switch to the off position with the other. “Jesus...” Jack shook her head and rolled her eyes at the unfortunate, yet somehow inappropriately amusing timing. “Thanks a lot, Kurt.”
The event most certainly could have sent her flying down the freeway back to her apartment, but, instead, Jack felt loosened up by what could very nearly be considered a Jungian synchronicity, and instead she pulled the key out of the ignition and pulled the handle on her car door. Sticking her cigarette between her lips, she pulled her white lab coat off of the hanger in the backseat and shrugged it on, then made sure that her picture id badge was firmly clipped to the front pocket. She took one last drag from her cigarette before flicking it away and shoved the rest of the pack into her front pocket and stowed her lighter in the side of one of the cups of her bra, as she was apt to do when working so that it would not be stolen. From her pants pocket, she pulled out a small bottle of body spray and quickly spritzed herself so as not to smell like a large ashtray as a first impression. Stowing the spray back away, she then slung a large black leather bag that held her personal medical equipment over her shoulder. Finally, she pulled out a cardboard filing box that had some personal effects in it. With a final deep breath, she began trudging toward the front door of the building.
Reaching the door, she fumbled a bit as she tried very hard to awkwardly balance the box against her hip, as well as work against the gravity that was apparently working overtime to try to pull her down in the opposite direction due to the heavy medical bag on her shoulder. After several near misses where she just barely somehow managed to keep everything from tragically crashing to the ground, as well as several rather explicit expressions later, the guard on the inside of the door suddenly seemed to notice her there and turned around to push the door open for her. Readjusting everything, Jack trudged through the open door, then flashed an awkward smile and thanked the guard before making her way over to the large front desk before her.
“Hi,” she said a little more meekly than she had originally planned. She took a deep breath and continued, a little less shakily. “Jacqueline Evans, it’s my first day... I was told to report here?” With a small smile, she set the box on the floor next to her and, being rather short, pushed herself up on the tips of her toes to make sure that her id badge was fully visible to the guard. He just glanced at her very briefly, grumpily motioned his hand toward a clipboard on the top of the desk, mumbled to her to sign in and then instructed her to wait there. Jack picked up the pen that was attached to the desk by a chain, signed her name neatly and waited there, nervously drumming her fingers on the top of the counter. After a few minutes, she pushed the leather bag, which felt as though it was becoming increasingly heavy as she waited, onto the floor next to the box. She shoved her hands into the side pockets of her lab coat and gazed around the room for what seemed like a lifetime while she waited for the guard to return.